Sunday, December 30, 2012

and so this is (was) christmas

Well this last week has been full of Christmas things and celebrations, namely:

The entire family wearing matching pajamas on Christmas Eve.  There is photographic evidence of Mom and Dad and Phil in their festive sleepwear as well, but they wouldn't be too happy pictures of them in snowflake jammies made an appearance on Oh Laura Darling.


 I think Santa approved of our coordinated sleepwear!

I really, really, REALLY wanted all of us to wear our PJs to my aunt's house for Christmas dinner, but the rest of the family didn't seem to be on board for some reason, so we put on real outfits.

 Maybe next year I can convince them to go the All Day Matching Pajama route.

Rome wasn't built in a day.

 I stayed at my parents' house on Christmas night too, under the guise of not wanting to drive back to my apartment late at night, but really because I wanted to take advantage of the chocolate chip cookie supply for breakfast the next morning.

After I ate about forty six cookies for breakfast I went back to my apartment, but I was home the very next day because a certain someone was turning SEVENTEEN! Which is hard to believe considering she was only born yesterday.

 It snowed yesterday, and a snowstorm is all fun and games until you're standing in the parking lot of your apartment complex with soaking wet feet scraping snow off your car and having it blow right back in your face because IT IS THE WINDIEST DAY EVER.

I even managed to get snow INSIDE of my car somehow.  That takes talent.

After that pleasant little activity I accompanied Matt one a trip to the mall for some new jeans.

Listen.  You date someone for a long time and think you know them.  And then you go jeans shopping with them.

Matt's not typically a shopping kind of guy but he turned into a brand new man once we hit the jeans section at JC Penney.  At one point he went into the dressing room and I was wandering around the racks outside and I heard someone singing along with the Kelly Clarkson song that was playing with MUCH GUSTO. And also, much volume.

And then I realized that someone was Matt.

It's amazing what an eight dollar pair of stonewashed relaxed fit jeans will do for a guy.

I'll admit, they are pretty stylish.  

But not as stylish as the red snowflake pajamas of Christmas 2012.


Sunday, December 23, 2012

at least i don't have to do any of that again for six months

In college everyone said that the weekend started on Thursday. I wasn't a huge party person in college, so my Thursdays typically consisted of a solid meal at the dining commons and a trip to Target.  And studying of course, Mom and Dad.

You may think a Thursday couldn't get more boring than that.  Well, let me introduce you to December 20, 2012.

On Thursday I got the oil changed in my car, went to the eye doctor, and had my teeth cleaned.  I also paid my car insurance, renter's insurance, and life insurance.  The day pretty much screamed THIS IS THE THURSDAY OF A GROWN UP, RESPONSIBLE INDIVIDUAL. 

However, I did learn the hard way that it's not wise to schedule all of those expen$ive events for the same week.  Especially when that week is the one right before Christmas.

Nice to see you for three seconds, paycheck.

I got my oil changed on my lunch hour so that I could make it to my eye doctor appointment right after work.  This was my first time seeing this doctor, so I sat down in the chair and told him what kind of contacts I wear.  And that's when he said, "Oh.  Whoa.  You're what we in the biz like to call "three finger vision test patients.  I'm not even going to put the letters on the screen, cause you're never gonna see them.  How many fingers am I holding up?"  

Well.  That was a new low. 

I got out of there with just enough time to swing by my parents' house to brush my teeth one last time before I went to the dentist.

Let me just say that as far as dental patients go, I consider myself slightly above average.  Admittedly, I do not floss enough, but I brush my teeth twice a day.  I don't eat or drink a lot of sugary things, I am no stranger to a bottle of mouthwash, and I am religious about keeping my six month cleaning appointments.  

And so, when I go to the dentist, I just want to lay quietly in the chair while my teeth are polished and x-rayed.  I do not want to be the recipient of a lecture about bio-film and tartar and gingivitis, none of which I have.  Unfortunately that's exactly what happened on Thursday night, and the hygienist spent almost the entirety of the appointment preaching to the dental choir.

The only time she was not lecturing me on all things dental disease related was when she looked in my mouth and said  "WHOA! Are you planning to get a retainer, or are you just going to leave everything 'as is'?"

I opened my eyes and looked up at her.  "Umm. As is, thank you very much."

I think she felt a little bad after that because she said "Not that there's anything wrong with 'as is' of course! That's not what I meant! You have a gorgeous smile."

 A gorgeous smile that could stand to meet a retainer, apparently.
I was hopeful that things would look up when the dentist came in, but they didn't.

He looked at the info sheet that I updated before my appointment and asked me about my job as a paralegal.  I told him about the (government-related) job that I have and enjoy and he said, ""Oh.  So I guess no private law firms are hiring?"

I started out my evening of appointments feeling like a million bucks, and finished it feeling like a major underachiever with poor vision who could benefit from some orthodontia.

It was a long drive home.

At least my car had fresh oil.

And comprehensive, up to date insurance.


Monday, December 17, 2012

who said that english degree wouldn't be marketable?

Way back when I was looking for a job, I posted my resume on Career Builder.

And tonight I got this email from them.  Apparently that English degree is more valuable than I anticipated.

Or maybe this company will just hire anybody.



get fancy for the holidays

A few weeks ago I decided that I needed to get serious with my makeup. 

And by "get serious" I mean do a little more than a half-hearted mascara application and smearing on whatever lip gloss I can scrounge up in my purse while sitting at a red light. 

And so, after I watched several tutorials on youtube about smoky eyes and the right way to apply lip liner, I decided to give it a shot. And, well, let's just say I ended up looking like I was suffering from a black eye and a bee sting to the lip. 

But I didn't give up because PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT. 

And also, it's fun to shop for makeup. :-) 

I use Bare Minerals foundation, but the rest of my makeup supply is all from the drug store. Cover Girl is one of my favorite brands. I have yet to find a lip stain that I like as much as I like theirs. 

I am always looking for mascara that will make my lashes look long and full and curly, aka how they looked in high school, and I think I might give this 24 hour mascara a shot.

CoverGirl LashBlast 24HR Mascara
If you buy this mascara online, you can get a nail gloss for free until December 29, 2012! And you can't beat free nail polish!  And in even better news, all new customers get 15% off their order with the code A9Z-MN5-KY3-ISA, and shipping is free on orders over $25!

So head on over and do some Cover Girl shopping!


Sunday, December 16, 2012

tomorrow will be a rough return to the office

Well, despite the snazzy elf  hat that I wore all day Friday...
...the paralegals and our Whoville display did not win the office decorating contest.


The aisle next to us did a Nightmare Before Christmas theme, and when the judges came around they broke out a strobe light and theme music.  Their ace in the hole.

Hello, second place.  Nice to see you again this year.  NOT.   

We tried to be gracious losers, but OH, IT WAS NOT EASY.

And to add salt to the wound, we had a little holiday party at a restaurant down the street after work, and I was the only person there who didn't win a door prize.  That's right.  The only person. 

 My parents were going away for the weekend so on Saturday morning I headed home to stay with my sidekick, Emily and make sure she didn't host any wild parties while my parents were away.

And also to drive her to the movies on Saturday night and feed the dog.

The first order of business was getting manicures.  I got red and Emily got blue.  Evidently we were feeling very patriotic.

 After our manicures we strolled the mall for a little bit, and then came home to have a healthy, balanced meal of pizza and mozzarella sticks.

We ate in the family room because WILD AND CRAZY, and Rosie sat at my feet the entire time and stared straight ahead in what I can only imagine was an effort to convince herself there wasn't a giant slice of pizza six inches from her face.

 After that we rented a box truck and took it for a little Saturday evening joy ride.
 Oh, I kid.  Matt was actually moving and around 5:30 he called me and said, "Hey, look out your window!"  And there he was driving by in this hot rod, having the time of his life.

We came inside and I started to straighten up the kitchen, and I asked Emily to go see if the Christmas tree needed to be watered.

I walked out a few minutes later to find this.
 I'm just as confused as you are, Rosie.

Emily went to the movies last night which left me and Rosie home alone to read and watch House Hunters and eating Cap'n Crunch.  

It was glorious.  

And then I went up to my old bedroom to go to sleep and snuggled underneath the pile of blankets that were folded at the bottom of the bed.

This morning I wandered downstairs and asked Emily where the brown fleece blanket came from, because it was so soft and cozy.

Turns out the blanket is actually a gift for her Advent Angel at school.


Thursday, December 13, 2012

just call me cindy lou who

I wasn't kidding when I said my cubicle is decorated like the toy shop in Who-Ville, all in preparation for the office-wide decorating contest tomorrow.  

I predict first place.



Monday, December 10, 2012

mint, jewelry, and tinsel oh my

Well, I didn't win the lottery last week.  So it was back to work today, which wasn't ideal but at least I got to spend the day in a warm office sitting inside a cubicle that's decorated like the Who-ville toy shop from The Grinch.  

That's right.

I have the office-wide decorating contest IN THE BAG.

Matt and I had plans to meet my cousin and her fiance for dinner on Friday night, and it was a horrible night, weather wise.  It was cold and rainy and windy and the kind of night that makes you want to SEEK COVER.

We arrived at the restaurant a little early, so we got a table and ordered drinks.  I chose a cucumber martini with lemon and mint, which, looking back, kind of screams I AM MORE OF A JULY/AUGUST BEVERAGE THAN A MID-DECEMBER ONE, but I just went for it.  

The waitress was gone for quite a while, and when she finally returned, she has a less than amused look on her face.  "Sorry it took so long," she said as she put the drink on the table.  "I had to go out back and cut the mint out of the herb garden.  Most people order this drink in the summertime."


So, by comparison, my day today didn't seem so bad. 

I could have been cutting mint sprigs in a rainstorm.

On Saturday I met my mom and sister at the mall, and we spent some serious time in Charming Charlie's.  I had never been to a Charming Charlie's before this one opened a few months ago, and I obviously love it because what's not to love about a giant store with millions of pieces of jewelry priced under $14.99 and arranged by color?

Nothing, that's what.

We walked around the store for about half an hour and my mom and I tried on rings and bracelets and watches.  Finally Emily looked at my mom and I and said, "Ehh, I don't really see anything I like in here."

I know.  

I've never felt more disconnected from her than I did at that moment.

And here's the part where I could say that Saturday night was full of glitz and glamour and more cucumber martinis.  That would be a lie though because what really happened is Matt came over, I finished up my Christmas shopping, we ate dinner, and then I convinced Matt that it would be a great idea to settle in and watch a good Christmas movie.

Or so I thought.

I went to my bedroom to put my sweatpants on, and when I returned Matt was watching Army of Darkness, which is an early nineties comedy/horror movie that CRACKED MATT UP.  He was HYSTERICAL.

In the first ten minutes there was time travel (yuck), multiple sword fights, three monsters that emerged from murky water, a wall of spikes that closed in on the main character while he was trying to escape a cavernous swamp, and a mysterious hand that was not attached to a body but that managed to pop up in every scene.

What a cozy Christmas memory it was.

Sunday was my family's annual Christmas trip to Cabela's, WORLD'S FOREMOST OUTFITTERS, and I went home a little early and we decorated the Christmas tree.

My mom decided to use tinsel instead of garland this year, and so we each grabbed a handful or twelve and got to work while my mom told us how "there is no such thing as too much tinsel."

A little while later my dad walked in the room and said, "Whoa.  That's a lot of tinsel."

We all stepped back to take a look.  

It was a lot of tinsel.

Needless to say we ceased our liberal tinsel application at that point, but I do love the way it turned out.  

No one will accuse this tree of having a lack of sparkle.


Thursday, December 6, 2012

reason 3,468 I was an english major

I sounded pretty believable until I went and mentioned density.  

I knew that was a mistake.


Monday, December 3, 2012

the last four days have been keepers

Michelle texted me on Friday afternoon and asked if I'd be interested in going Christmas shopping with her after work.  Since I never met a shopping trip I didn't like, I jumped right on board with that plan and we headed out to the mall as soon as I got home.  

While we were in the car I talked to Matt, who was planning to wake up at FOUR O CLOCK IN THE A.M. on Saturday to go hunting.  At the end of the conversation he said, "Okay, well, I'll try to shoot you a bird."

Which is a line you always hear in the fairy tales.

Michelle and I did some damage in various stores and then decided to get some spaghetti and meatballs from an Italian place in the food court before we went home.  It was on the walk to the food court that we realized that while we were carrying a few bags, exactly zero of them held any Christmas gifts for others.  

Our hearts are definitely in the right place this holiday season.  

And then we sat in the food court eating spaghetti and talking about how we are our parents' favorite children.  

Safe to say we have mastered the gift of humility.
On Saturday I got together with some girls from work to bake Christmas cookies.  As evidenced by our cookies, we probably should have paid more attention to the oven and less attention to coming up with a detailed plan to decorate our cubicles like buildings in Who-Ville.

Matt came over after the Christmas cookie extravaganza, and we ate dinner and watched Burn Notice.  Burn Notice is Matt's favorite show, but I'm not a huge fan because I can never tell if the main characters are good guys or bad guys.  I'm pretty sure they're good guys, but occasionally the bombing/shooting/blowing up makes me doubt that conclusion.  Every single time we watch together I request clarification on the (VERY COMPLICATED) plot and whether or not Mike and Sam are protagonists or antagonists, and then offer an alternative programming option a la House Hunters or the Cosby Show.

Let the record show that Matt has never, not ever, chosen House Hunters or the Cosby Show over Burn Notice. 

My sincerest apologies to the Huxtables.

And then, today.  OH, TODAY.  WHAT A DAY.

Things started off on a high note when I heard Kate Middleton's baby news.  I'm finally going to be a godmother!

A few hours later I strolled up to the front desk to check my mail, and the receptionist handed me a package from a flower company.  It was from Matt, and inside was a green tree, with a box of ornaments and even a little strand of lights.  

It made my whole day today.

And I have a feeling it will make my whole tomorrow too.  :)