that time matt was tased


The last time I wrote about our attendance at the Citizen's Police Academy, Matt hadn't been tased yet.
 (The English major in me has gone back and forth on the past tense of taser several times.  Is it tased, or tasered? The officer teaching our class says 'tased,' but he also says 'burgled' so I take his verb conjugation with a grain of salt.  On the upside, the attorney at work this week asked which form of "compli/ement" to use when referencing a group of attorneys, and my English degree and I were thrilled to have the correct answer for him.)

Anyway.

We arrived at class the night of the taser presentation, and the officer slid a three page waiver across the table to Matt and said, "Can you just sign this?"

The paralegal in me said LET'S READ EVERY SINGLE WORD, and also, IS ALL OF OUR INSURANCE UP TO DATE?

Matt did indeed sign the waiver, and then we waited one entire hour while a detective came in and taught us all about tasers and why they're so effective.

In short, because they're debilitating.

STEP RIGHT UP, MATT.

After we had a quick break for soft pretzels, Matt was called to the front of the room.  At that moment, several (handsome) young men walked through the side door.

"Are you the paramedics?" asked a woman in our class.

"No ma'am," they said, "We are the SWAT Team.  We're just here to watch."

And then, Matt was tased/tasered.  I stood at the back of the room and couldn't even watch, but here he is afterwards with a few of his adoring fans.


The taser makes your muscles contract 19 times per second, for five seconds, and when the electric charge ended, Matt said very matter of factly, "Well, that hurt."

He said it was the worst pain he's felt in his whole life, and will never do anything to get tasered.

Which means he is going to have to give up his life of crime.


All jokes aside, the officers talked at length about how tasers have changed policing significantly, in a positive way, and how they're so grateful for that option.

We finished our Citizen's Police Academy classed a few weeks ago, and with all the controversy surrounding police departments these days, I have to say that I'm thankful for ours.

I know that nobody is perfect, but our police department is one whose officers reflect the citizens they serve and values the community they serve in.



And don't worry, I'm not considering a career change.  I could hardly stand straight under the weight of that vest!


Comments

I come from a family of police officers on my dad's side--two uncles, three cousins, various other distantly related people. My cousin is a street cop in Milwaukee, and he's on the kind of task force that shows up for hostage situations and breaks down doors. He's also a father of four young children. I cannot even imagine the courage it takes for him to do that job, and for his wife to send him off to work every day.

Police departments certainly have their fair share of problems, but I doubt a single person who complains about them would want to go without them for even one day.
"We're the SWAT team, we're just here to watch."

WHAT.

LOL
Robin said…
You know things are getting interesting when there is a three-page waiver to sign!
Perfectly Port said…
Oh my goodness he got tased.... I agree I don't want to experience that! I don't think I could stand under the weight of that uniform either! Xoxo Erin
Lux G. said…
Looking cool in this vest.
Thanks for sharing your experience.
Omg!! lol My husband is a police officer and when he went through the academy they had to be tased a few times, pepper sprayed, punched in the face...He came home with bruises and burns everyday! I totally couldn't do that!
rooth said…
Oh Matt... you guys seriously crack me up. I'm glad he survived with his dignity intact :)
Oh my gosh!! That's so intense! Bravo on him for saying yes to that. I like how many people were taking videos. Yikes. hahah I love that you guys are doing this! XO - Alexandra

Simply Alexandra: My Favorite Things
P!nky said…
The SWAT team just came to watch, that's toooooo funny! Sounds so painful!
Rebecca Jo said…
You in that vest!!! Eating you alive!
NOPEEEE - that's scary they 'test' it out on people. There was a person who died in Indiapolis this weekend from being tased. Glad you didnt see that story before Matt stepped up to the plate.
Amie said…
They are a great tool but here lately we have had officers use them on people on drugs, like acid, and they do not do a thing!! Can you imagine?? It's crazy!! Go Matt! You mean you didn't get a video of it?
I still cannot believe that he was tasered! That is just crazy! So cool to be able to say that he did it, though!! I wouldn't have been able to watch either.
Brianne said…
LOL at SWAT. Go Matt! Way to literally take one for the team! I'm sorry that his life of crime will have to come to an end lol.
That is awesome. My dad has been tased as he is in the military and it is fun to hear about it and watch the videos. Go matt!!!
A couple of our close friends are part of the police force and their stories about being tasered make me never want to have that happen to me, haha! So glad Matt made it through like a champ!
Audrey Louise said…
I am now ridiculously paranoid that I've used compli/ement incorrectly... I mean, I don't think I have, but I've never put ANY thought into the similarity of those words... Hmm.

Half of me thinks getting tasered/tased would be fun and half of me shudders at the thought. Ha.
Hena Tayeb said…
That is wonderful what the two of you are doing to help out the community. Many people like to talk about helping but can't be bothered to actually do it.. thank you.
Nadine Lynn said…
Haha that SWAT team just shows up???? That's hilarious! I dont think I would want to endure this, but kudos to him!!! Hopefully he will stay out of trouble now ;)
Holy crap. It happened.

I would be afraid I'd wet my pants in class if I volunteered.
Oh my gosh, getting tased is so scary!!! I can't believe Matt did that!!! And that vest on you is hilarious!!!
I've been waiting for this post! I give that guy a LOT of credit.
Hahahaha, I loveee that the SWAT team came to watch - and that everyone had their phones out! Hilarious!

Faith said…
Hilarious that his response was, "That hurt".
The Lady Okie said…
Okay, five minutes is a long time! I bet that did hurt a lot. I often wonder why there are all these stories about shootings, when the police could just tase someone, you know? Obviously I don't know anything so I'm not one to talk. Anyway, interesting experience for him! Good to know it hurts a lot. I suppose I shall give up my life of crime also. Bummer.
Jenny said…
Oh my gosh! I can't imagine watching or being tasered! Yikes!
Kimberly G said…
That must have been pretty horrible for him, but he knows how someone would feel if they got tazered. Is that a requirement for him to be tazered? Thanks for stopping by my blog.
http://therantingsofadramaqueensmum.blogspot.com
Jenny Evans said…
I need to go look up this 'tased' vs 'tasered' thing...