unfortunately this blog post took an unexpected turn

Well, I'm here to report that no car windows have broken this week, but my car Old Blue is currently at the mechanic for her annual inspection and I am about as nervous as I could be.  It's ridiculous really.  I just hope she passes.  I hope they are nice to her.  I parked on a hill so I hope they remember to release the parking brake before driving her into the garage.  I hope they know sometimes the turn signal skips a beat but it always gets back into rhythm after a few seconds.

It's that time of year when all of these moms are talking about dropping their kids off to school and how a little piece of their heart is walking away from them and through those school doors and I'm over here thinking 

(PAUSE.  HOLD PLEASE. THIS IS A TEST OF THE EMERGENCY ALERT SYSTEM.)

As I was typing the sentence above, my phone rang and it was the mechanic calling to tell me that Old Blue needs front brakes and rotors to pass inspection.  

I called Matt to give him the news.  He wondered aloud when he last changed my brakes.  Since I just so happened to have my blog open, I searched the word "brakes" and found that they were changed in March of 2013 because I had written a blog post about it.

Every cent I've made off of this blog is now worth it.

That would be zero cents.

(throwback photo!)

Anyway.  I dropped the car off after work yesterday.  I had to stop at the grocery store first and bought a few things, including a lemon. It had been a long day on top of a long week and when I got to the self-checkout and it was time to pay for my lemon, I clicked the "unpackaged produce button"  on the self-checkout screen, then the "vegetable" button, and then the "L-N" button. 

I couldn't believe it, but it seemed that they had forgotten to add lemon to the options for L vegetables.  I scrolled and scrolled, and not a lemon to be found.  

There were leeks.  Several varieties of lettuce.  Something called a loquat.

But no lemon.

I stared at the screen for so long that the supervising cashier came over to assist me, and when I told her there was no option for lemon, she said, "That's because you're in the vegetable section.  A lemon is a fruit."

Of course a lemon is a fruit.  I know that.  But here is my proposal for grocery stores far and wide.  Put all produce in the same category.  Just lump it all together.  By the time I get to the self-checkout screen, I usually don't have enough brain power left to remember what produce is a fruit, and what is a vegetable, and that some stores call sweet potatoes yams, and I don't know 47 varieties of onions, I know yellow and red.  I don't know the difference between white and yellow, or what constitutes a sweet onion, or a vidalia, and that a tomato is technically a fruit but is commonly accepted as a vegetable and is therefore in the vegetable category.

Let's get back to basics.

I got myself checked out so it all worked out in the end, and now the only lemon I have to worry about is my car.

Just kidding.  My car isn't a lemon, it's just getting old.  

But with all of these lemons in my life, maybe I should make lemonade as the old saying goes.  I certainly know where to find the sugar in the grocery store.