Well, I woke up this morning and made the unfortunate discovery that my left eye was red and bloodshot and sore. Over the past week I’ve been getting a lot of mileage out of the joke that “these Olympics have ‘costas’ an eye,” but now I’m regretting every single time I said that.
I’m getting married three weeks from today, and I can’t afford to have some sort of strange medical malady on March 8th. It was bad enough that I went to the dentist for a cleaning last week and my jaw popped out of place after my fluoride treatment. I immediately called the hygienist to inform her that SOMETHING WAS AMISS and she came over, inspected, and calmly said, “Ahh, yes, I see. The mandible has simply disengaged.”
“Well, I’d appreciate it if you could re-engage it please because SPEAKING OF ENGAGED, I’M GETTING MARRIED IN A MONTH AND MY MANDIBLE NEEDS TO BE IN TIP TOP CONDITION.”
Actually, my dentist appointment was doomed from the start. I got a phone call, text message, and email confirming the day and time, and I wrote it on my calendar for Tuesday night at 5:45. I upped my brushing and flossing game in the days leading up the appointment and by Tuesday afternoon I was ready for the big moment.
I fought rain and rush hour traffic and walked into the extremely crowded dentist office, battle worn and weary, at 5:43.
The receptionist greeted me but then said, “Laura, do we have you on the list for tonight?”
“Sure do,” I said, “5:45.”
She flipped through the appointment book and then sympathetically said, “It’s actually…at 5:45……..tomorrow.”
Well. Now that’s embarrassing.
I was so ready to show off my freshly flossed teeth that I showed up to the appointment TWENTY FOUR HOURS EARLY. I suppose it’s better than twenty four hours late, but still not ideal.
Let’s hope that this eye condition doesn’t result in a trip to the doctor’s office because if it does, I will need to write that appointment day in stone. Until then I’ll just be standing here in solidarity (and in a very dark room) with Mr. Costas.
Eye’d appreciate good thoughts for the both of us.