Saturday, September 19, 2015

i wish i had an atlas on hand

Well, I sat down to write this post on Thursday night but quickly became distracted by all things presidential debate.  And by that I mean talking back to the television, reading twitter, and texting Emily.

She's such a political junkie.

I won't tell you which side of the political spectrum I land on.  But let's just say that when Matt and I were packing for vacation two weeks ago I mentioned we needed to put something on our gray suitcase to set it apart from all of the other gray suitcases.  I was envisioning something along the lines of a cute bandanna tied to the handle or some colorful ribbons on the zippers.

Five minutes later Matt proudly said, "Mission accomplished."  I walked into the bedroom to see the suitcase with a giant NRA sticker front and center.

Life is full of surprises.

We were going to the Dominican Republic, specifically Punta Cana, for our vacation.  We booked the trip back in February and we looked online every few months since then to see how much a first class upgrade would cost.  Unfortunately it always cost way too many dollars, but as we were waiting at the gate an hour before takeoff, Matt said, "Just for fun, I'm going to ask the agent how much an upgrade would cost."  It turns out it's much cheaper if you wait until the last minute, so we upgraded to first class.

I pulled out the camera so I would be ready to document the whole fancy experience and that's when I made the unfortunate but well-timed realization that I'd only packed one part of the two part camera charger.

And then Matt traversed the airport to find an electronics stand where he found a universal charger that cost ten bucks on Amazon but at the airport cost "an arm an a leg."

Vacation is so relaxing.

But the money we spent to upgrade our tickets PLUS the money for the camera charger still didn't equal what a first class ticket cost three months ago, so in my mind, we technically saved money.

I'm all about a bargain.

But please enjoy the following photos of us in first class.  They were definitely not free.

I hate the taking off portion of an airplane ride so I was very on edge as we taxied down the runway.  Matt took the window seat and kept trying to make me feel better by telling me he took an aerospace class in college and some technical mumbo jumbo about airspeed above the wing and below the wing, but sitting in a metal tube with hundreds of other people launching into the atmosphere isn't my idea of a good time.  I closed my eyes and kept telling myself that flying in an airplane was safer than driving down 476 south at rush hour, which I do every day.

Once we got to cruising altitude I had a blast.

And a Bloody Mary.

Or two.

Our vacation was pretty much the following things on repeat:

Pina Coladas
Zip Lining
Horseback riding

And after a glorious eight days in Punta Cana, we landed back home in Philadelphia last Saturday night.

We got to baggage claim before our suitcases did and we weren't sure which direction the belt would rotate, so Matt went to one side and I went to the other so we would be ready for anything.  I got to my position and the woman next to me leaned over and whispered, "Excuse me, but do you know what state Philadelphia is in?"

Listen.  I actually looked around for a few seconds to see if I was on some sort of hidden camera prank show.  I didn't see any camera crews so I said, "Yes, I do.  It's in Pennsylvania."

"Oh thank you!" she said, "For the life of me, I just could not remember!"

She was from California.

When the man one the other side of me heard she was from California he said, "Wow, that's a long way from the Dominican Republic."  And she said, "Oh yes, it sure is.  But we were in Punta Cana."

I've never been more anxious to see an NRA emblazoned suitcase.

There's no place like home.

Or Philadelphia.


Bijoux said...

Ah, the perils of living in a flyover state!

But cripes sake, I'd be worried an NRA sticker would guarantee the luggage gets opened and checked. Slap a Mickey Mouse sticker over that!

MilitaryPugWife said...

Ohhh I'm glad you had fun!!!

Amanda - Voyage of the MeeMee said...

Damn... first class is some fancy shit! I need to be photoshopped in there... because that's as close as I'll ever get to it, lol

emily @ a little bit of emily said...

This is too funny!! Sounds like a fantastic trip!

Michelle said...

HYSTERICAL. That woman just fulfilled so many California stereotypes. Which by the way, I'm headed there tomorrow, IN FIRST CLASS TOO. Only because of my mom's miles she's accumulated. I would toast you a bloody mary in the air, but I'm going to have a baby on my lap so my flight will probably be 100% less relaxing that yours.

Whitney @ Work it Mommy said...

Im dying over your Cali woman, I swear all Californians are NOT like that! Your wit and humor has been missed so glad youre back :)

Amanda Klein said...

You have me LOL over here!! Also, I'm obsessed with airplane food. Husby travels a lot for business so we are upgraded pretty regularly, and I can't get enough of it. If he's on business and travels first, I request food pics. Oh, I'm that weird! Your vacay sounded lovely :) Have y'all tried SCUBA? The Caribbean is perfect for it!

birdie to be said...

Love these pictures! First class... amazing! We were upgraded once... now I never want to go back. And I'm with Whitney... I promise all of us Californians are not like that! Ha!

ae said...

Glad you had fun!

Marie said...

Oh first class, you are fancy! Glad to hear that you had a great vacation. There really is no place like home.

Lindsay at Lindsay'sSweetWorld said...

Oh for the love. I would have thought I was getting Punked. People are unbelievable.

Glad you had a fun trip, though!

Kate at Green Fashionista said...

How awesome that you guys upgraded to first class, it has never worked for us when asking at the gate but we will always keep trying!

Green Fashionista

Rebecca Jo said...

You always have the best stories & meet the weirdest - I mean, funniest - people :)

Yep, a camera charger pays for itself in memories :)You can tell your husband I said that :)

Brittany said...

I actually can't stop laughing about the lady who couldn't remember where Philadelphia is. That's phenomenal. I'd really love to hear more about the vacation, so I can live vicariously through you. The nachos, in particular. I'd love to hear about the nachos...

A Simple Southern Life said...

hahahha... the lady at baggage claim. That is too funny (and so sad). We went to Punta Cana for our honeymoon a little over a month ago. We had a blast.. I hope yall did too!

christina @ the new mrs said...

There most definitely is no place like Philadelphia - glad you had a fun trip with that nice upgrade AND figured out about the camera charger before taking off.

Evelina said...

Wow that lady has a lot to learn! I'm not even American but slowly working my way through learning all of the state capitals! Not to brag or anything haha!

Megan said...

This whole post made me laugh. Hysterical. Now I'm going to have to do some blog stalking!!

Baby Sister said...

You'll have to give me a head up the next time you go out of town so I can sneak in your luggage. Sounds like fun!

I hope being back home in Philadelphia, Missouri is treating you well. ;)