I should have known that today wasn't going to go well when I reached up to put my hair behind my ear on the drive to work and realized that I hadn't put any earrings in. Since I got my ears pierced eleven years ago, I can count on one hand the number of times I've gone without earrings. To me, forgetting earrings is worse than forgetting shoes. I am not myself without them.
And of course I couldn't forget my earrings on an ordinary day. No, today was the day I was going to meet the two new lawyers who will be working with our office. I may or may not have sat down dramatically at my desk this morning and cried WHAT WILL THE NEW LAWYERS THINK OF ME? WOULD IT BE WEIRD IF I MENTIONED TO THEM THAT I NORMALLY DO WEAR EARRINGS?
My coworkers informed that yes, that would be weird, and so all morning I practiced a hair-shake maneuver that caused my lovely locks to fall over my plain ears so that when I met the new bosses they wouldn't think, "I wonder why Laura wasn't wearing earrings."
Of course I knew that there was also the possibility that they might think "Gee I wonder Laura kept shaking her hair over and over like that," but listen, everything's a tradeoff and that's a risk I was willing to take.
After the introductions I had to go over to the courthouse to drop something off. I knew I would just be a few minutes, so instead of using my parking pass to park in the garage across the street, I decided to gather up some loose change and pay to park on the street. This reasoning behind this strategic decision was two-fold, because not only was I feeling moderately lazy, but also it was drizzling outside and I could not afford to ruin my hair when it was the only barrier between my un-bedazzled ears and the rest of the world.
In recent months the parking department has done away with individual meters and instead installed one kiosk on every block. And so, after I parked Old Blue in spot 106, I strolled over to the kiosk and put in a whopping $1.35. I thought I could have gotten away with just a dollar but decided to throw in a little extra in case I was inside longer than expected. ALWAYS THINKING AHEAD, I AM.
I will now present Exhibit A, my receipt.
I went inside, did what I had to do, and came out. I rounded the corner and Old Blue came into sight, and what to my wondering eyes should appear but a ticket in her windshield wipers.
I will now present Exhibit B, my ticket.
I stood by my car completely puzzled for several seconds. I fished my receipt out of my bag to verify that I had indeed paid and wasn't losing my mind. And there I stood in the rain, seeing in black and white that it was only 12:32 and I had enough money to stay in spot 106 until 12:57.
And that's about when I realized that my car was actually parked in spot 105.
I hung my head and drove back to the office where I promptly sought legal advice. I made sure to ask one of the lawyers who has been there a while because I didn't want my first impression on the new lawyers to be HI, I'M LAURA AND NOT ONLY DID I FORGET TO WEAR EARRINGS TODAY AND AS A RESULT AM ALL OUT OF SORTS, BUT IT APPEARS I CANNOT HANDLE BASIC STREET PARKING. NOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO ME TO COMPLETE ANY OFFICIAL LEGAL TASKS?
Anywho I was advised to take the ticket and the receipt to the parking office and explain my situation. Although I don't know if I have much of an explanation other than "OOPS."
And so tomorrow on my lunch hour I will be fighting city hall.
And you can bet that I will be wearing my fanciest earrings.