The weekend after Matt and I returned from our honeymoon, I was stricken with sickness in the form of a cough and congestion. Initially I thought it was simply a cold, but when I was still feeling lousy two weeks later and waking up several times each night coughing, I suspected it was something more serious.
Memories of happier times...
But did the persistent symptoms and sleepless nights cause me to call the doctor? Of course not. I didn't make that call until I had a coughing fit in Target that was so bad I had to leave. Apparently I can put up with sleepless nights, but clearly being interrupted while shopping that is a situation that requires some sort of urgent remedy via a medical professional.
I left work early the very next afternoon to head to the doctor. In the exam room I highlighted the coughing spells and made sure to add some extra drama, and even told the doctor that due to a neighbor's faulty home alarm system we were sleeping with two very loud fans in our bedroom, and my coughing still woke both me and Matt.
She asked me if I ever gasped for air during the coughing and while technically I hadn't, I hesitated with my answer just long enough to put some reasonable doubt in her mind.
The doctor checked me out and then diagnosed me with a sinus infection. She wrote a prescription for the sinus infection but not the cough, so I asked her if she had an over the counter alternative she'd recommend.
"Well," she said, "honey sure works great."
Doc, I haven't slept a solid night in two weeks between my neighbor's faulty alarm system and my moderate to severe cough. I am looking for a prescription for Robitussin with codeine and authorization for a refill or five.
Apparently my cough wasn't bad enough to warrant a prescription, but I hightailed it to CVS to pick up my other prescription and a large bottle of honey - NATURE'S COUGH SUPPRESSANT.
In the interest of full disclosure, I also picked up two Reese's Easter eggs on my way to the pharmacy counter to get my medicine, which turned out to be in the form of a NASAL SPRAY.
Matt called as I was walking to my car, and the timing of his call was perfect because I was able to share with him the wonderful news that his new bride would be self-administering a nasal spray every hours hours around the clock for the foreseeable future.
I've never been so attractive.
It turns out that I wasn't the only one having a bad day. Matt was calling to see if I could "come save him at Acme," where he'd unfortunately found himself at the end of the checkout line with a basket full of food and no wallet.
Last week was not our week.
I'm happy to report things are going much better this week.
Although, there was really nowhere to go but up.