Well, Matt and I joined a gym last week.
That's noteworthy because I am not the least bit athletic and/or all that interested in fitness. When I was a senior in college I had a knee issue that, according to my doctor, could be cured if I spent 40 minutes a day on a recumbent bike. So I got myself a gym membership and rode that recumbent bike for the prescribed 40 minutes a day and not a second more. And I didn't dare venture to the treadmill or the rowing machine or, heaven forbid, the stair stepper. And then I graduated and that was the end of my gym experience.
Until last Wednesday, when Matt and I laced up our sneakers and joined Planet Fitness. In the last seven days we have gone to the gym five times, which is more than I've gone in the last five years, so basically we have already gotten our money's worth.
On our first day we rode the bikes, but by day two I was drawn to the glamor and apparent grace of the elliptical machine. So I climbed aboard, started elliptical-ing, and lasted four painful minutes until I determined that my sweet spot at the gym is probably on the treadmill, speed: 3.2, incline: 0.
After day two I was feeling fantastic and full of energy, so when we got home I decided to do a little apple cider vinegar hair treatment because it makes my hair so shiny and smooth and who doesn't want their hair to look healthy? I wet my hair, soaked it in apple cider vinegar, and then folded some laundry and straightened up a little bit while the vinegar worked its magic.
I hopped back in the shower to rinse it out, and when I walked back out into the living room, Matt was just walking in the front door.
"Where'd you go?" I asked him.
"Something really smells weird in here and I cannot for the life of me figure out what it is - so I cleared the leftovers out of the fridge, and then took all of the trash out."
Well, mystery solved my friend.
I have half a bottle of apple cider vinegar on my head.
I AM THE CULPRIT.
Not only do I want my hair to look great while I stroll on the treadmill, but obviously I need the right wardrobe. So this weekend I got some fancy new fitness-style yoga capris, and last night I hit the mall to got myself a new pair of sneakers. I've read it takes 21 days for something to become a habit and while I'm only a third of the way there, I figure I may as well look adorable for the next 14 days while we see if this gym thing is going to be a long term commitment or a flash in the pan.
I wore my new workout gear to the gym tonight for the first time. I walked faster and with so much more pep in my step. And after the treadmill portion of the gym experience I pranced around from weight machine to weight machine in my fancy new shoes feeling like a million bucks.
And then we got into the car and I crossed my legs and I spotted this.
I had forgotten to take the tags off of my new shoes.
Listen. I keep myself humble. And marginally embarrassed.
Although if this gym thing doesn't turn into a habit in the next two weeks, I could still return the sneakers.