we are far more alike than she would care to admit

The other night I completed my final homework assignment.  Ever.  Or at least, until I go to law school.
 JUST KIDDING about the law school thing.  

The assignment was for my trusts and estates class, and it was to draft my will.  As I’ve mentioned before, I don’t have much in the way of assets, so it took no time at all for me to complete the assignment.  My beneficiaries will be so lucky!  When I die they will be handed enough money to go out to lunch!  And perhaps even order dessert!

After I was finished with my will, I decided to paint my nails, because earlier this week I had a regrettable run in with a bottle of turquoise nail polish and it was high time for the situation to be resolved.  I’ve been searching for a lovely shade of turquoise to take me through these final weeks of summer, and last week I thought I had met my match in the $1.00 nail polish section of Bed Bath and Beyond.  I rushed home with my new nail polish and some high expectations, and got to work right away.  

It looked awful.  Just plain UGLY.  Instead of the beachy, summery look that I was going for, I ended up looking like I either had some sort of unfortunate nail disease or incredibly poor circulation.

As if that wasn’t bad enough, I made a critical mistake during the application process.  As soon as I realized things were heading south, I decided to apply several coats in a futile effort to improve the color, which is how I ended up with TURQUOISE STAINED NAILS.  I am now sporting a lovely shade of gunmetal gray because that is the only color I had in my extensive nail polish collection dark enough to cover the remains of Turquoise Mistake of 2011.  

If anyone has some suggestions for turquoise nail polish that is in my price range, meaning three dollars or less, I’m all ears.    

While I was doing my nails, Emily was lured by the unmistakable smell of acetone and came in to join me.  Apparently I still had death/dying/last wills on my mind because before I knew what I was saying I suggested that we play a little game called “Seven words you want on your gravestone.”

WHAT?

Just call me if you need a cheerful, uplifting game suggestion!

 After intense deliberation, we decided that my seven words should be “She liked to laugh.  And eat alot.”  Emily’s would read, “She was quirky, and also very emotional.”

 I don’t know that two people have ever been summed up so accurately.

Once our nails were finished I went into my room to read a little bit before bed.  A few minutes later I heard a knock, and Emily popped her head in.

 “Hey Laura,” she said, “Am I allowed to please add two more words to my gravestone saying?”

 Was she allowed?  AS IF I AM THE BOSS OF HER HYPOTHETICAL EPITAPH.

However, I take my chances at authority where I can get them, so I gave her permission. As soon as I said yes she breathed a HUGE sigh of relief and said, “OH GOOD, because I REALLY want to make sure I add that I’m pretty.”

The good news is, we won’t need to find room for the word “humble.”

Comments

Abby said…
Unfortunately it doesn't meet your $3 nail polish budget, but Turquoise and Caicos by Essie is a good summer color. For a fall turq/jade color, Yodel Me On My Cell by OPI is one of my favorites. I'm not sure if you have an Ulta near you, but I save their $3.50 off a $10 purchase and use it to buy the nicer nail polishes. Helps them to be a little more affordable!
ae said…
OPI or Essie are probably your best bets for a good turquoise polish. I know they can be kind of pricey but I usually buy mine from Amazon when they are on sale.
Lauren said…
bummer about the turquoise polish...hope the stain goes away soon!

I usually love the OPI by Sephora collection, sometimes they have some of the more seasonal colors on sale online for super cheap!
Sarah said…
I am totally with you on the three dollar thing. The other day I bought earrings at the store that were on sale for $1.87. I told Christopher that $1.87 is pretty much my favorite price range EVER. A close second in FREE.
Teenage Bride said…
you two are a riot!
Teenage Bride said…
you two are a riot!
Your friend sounds hilarious : ). So do you. I think gun metal might be kind of lovely on nails. A little goth perhaps. Congratulations on your blog nomination on CBS. How exciting. Nice to meet you.
Carla said…
Sinful Colors from Walgreens. It's $2 a bottle, comes in tons of colors and seems to be a good polish. My mom has been getting manicures for years and swore by OPI polish but she's really digging this stuff. And if your lucky you can get it on sale for $1. Happy polishing.

Going to think about this 7 words business.
Erin said…
Hahaha, cute story:) But she's right! Your sister is very pretty!
Nicole said…
I don't think our sisters could be more alike. Told mine I wanted to practice my photography skills on her and she told me that she wanted a canvas of her blown-up... to hang in her own room. Oh, Lord.

Responding to your email tonight, by the way!
LOL, I love your posts! they always make me laugh :) hmm...I think I'd have to give some thought to what mine would say....only 7 words eh?! ...I'll have to think on that for a bit
Julie said…
I've been searching for a gun metal grey color - What one do you have? Would you suggest it? Sorry I can't be any help with the turquoise question, I have a few blues I like, but none I would call turquoise...

And your gravestone game cracked me up. I just texted my boyfriend with that question, I'm sure I'll get 400 question marks as a response!
Stephanie said…
What a fun gravestone game! I love Emily's two more words! :) I'm following you now!
essie has a cute summer blue! gun metal grey is a good option too!
Emily said…
haha, that's hilarious. Who wouldn't want that added to their gravestone?

Nail polish is so tricky. I just started getting back into that, so I have no good words of turquoise wisdom for you, but I hope you find a good bottle soon. :)

Emily w/Amazing Grapes
Neuffj said…
You stopped by <a href="http://neuffj.com>The Neuff</a> earlier today, so I am returning the favor. I like your sense of humor. I love turquoise, it's my fav color! I gotta think about what my gravestone would say. Sounds like a fun game to me lol :D
Oh no! I hate when a new nail polish doesn't work out!
Baby Sister said…
Ugh!! I hate getting ugly colors...I'll keep my eyes open for a good turquoise!!
I'm going to have to play that gravestone game with Boyfriend...it could be very entertaining. :)
Bride-onicles said…
Aww that made me laugh, you and Emily are too cute. I miss my sisters soo much!
Bride-onicles said…
Aww that made me laugh, you and Emily are too cute. I miss my sisters soo much!
Jeanine said…
Let me add my two cents with the rest, ughh...I just bought and wore "wet cement" by sally hansen...ya know couple bucks...cool color on the outside of the bottle...yeah...that name should of tipped me off. Icky. The only thing worse was when I took it off and it flipping stained by nails a pukey yellow. Wahhhh. That's me still sobbing. I've been having to do major nail therapy repair.

BTW...fabulously written narrative here...I was laughing...what a completely run-of-the-mill convo that was! hahaha

Jeanine
LaynahRose said…
hahaha she did NOT say that! too funny. hey, do you think I'd be allowed to add a few more words to mine as well, boss?
Alana said…
Ok this post is hilarious! And what a fun party game!