My sister has a twitter account and she has recently starting posting hilarious tweets pairing song titles with her current situations and they CRACK. ME. UP.
The other night Emily and I went to Chipotle for dinner. After we paid we realized that we'd completely forgot to order drinks, so we decided to take our burrito bowls to my parents' house to eat. When we got to the house I told Emily that her tweets had been so clever and funny and she asked me why I don't use twitter more often.
"I don't really like to write tweets," I said, "I like to re-post funny things that other people write. Like the one I posted today about how 'don't want no scrubs' is a double negative."
She stared at me with a blank look on her face.
"You know, like the TLC song No Scrubs?"
"No. I have no idea what you're talking about," she said.
I almost fell off the couch.
And so I navigated us on a two hour long journey down memory lane and introduced her to not only No Scrubs but also Waterfalls, some Will Smith classics, Country Grammar, and and then we took a turn down the super pop road of BB Mak, 98 Degrees, N Sync, Aaliyah, and finally Mandy Moore.
When my girl Mandy came on the computer screen singing Candy and wearing a crew neck long sleeved t-shirt and a pair of Levi's, I said to Emily, "See? This is how pop stars dressed back in the day. Not like today when we have Miley Cyrus prancing around wearing hardly more than a few pieces of strategically placed dental floss."
And that's when Emily, who is seven years younger than I am, said, "Whoa, Laur. You sound OLD."
I took that opportunity to tell Emily about the outfit that I wore to my very first school dance in seventh grade. Boot cut blue jeans, a white t-shirt, a blue and white checkered blouse unbuttoned over the white t-shirt, and my gym sneakers.
AND I LOOKED GREAT.
I may have even crimped my hair.
I also told her about parachute pants and pretty much blew her mind with the concept.
When I got home that night I was thoroughly impressed with the late 90s/early 2000s knowledge that I'd imparted unto Emily. She tweeted accordingly:
The next night Emily and I went to the Idina Menzel concert which was AMAZING. I loved every single second of the whole experience. In fact, I've been inspired to make a late-in-life break into showbiz.
We'd gone to the Ingrid Michaelson concert at the same venue a few weeks ago, and our fellow concert goers stood up the whole time which was unfortunate because I like to sit at a concert.
In Emily's eyes that makes me TOTALLY LAME.
But Idina took the stage and after about fifteen seconds of standing and clapping everyone returned to their seated positions and I whispered to Emily, "Whew. Looks like this is going to be a sitting type of concert," and she said very dryly, "If there's a string section on stage, it means it's a sitting concert."
And then on the drive home I told her that I wished I'd brought binoculars AND THEN not thirty seconds later I used the phrase "hitch in my giddy up."
She officially think I'm ancient.
But I think she should be happy that I have such great taste in music.
And that I've retired my parachute pants.