Sunday, January 27, 2013

after all this, i did take my car to a real mechanic



On Thursday, Matt said he would swing by my apartment after work to check on my car's brake issue. Since I got home early, I decided to check out the status of the brake fluid reservoir for myself before he arrived.

Do you like how I used brake fluid reservoir into that sentence like it's a phrase I throw around all the time?

Anyway, I went out to my car it was nothing short of miraculous that I was even able to pop the hood and figure out how to prop it up. And then I took a photo of the insides and it to Matt with the message, "OK - CAN YOU TELL ME WHICH ONE IS THE BRAKE FLUID RESERVOIR?"

I know what you're thinking.  OH LAURA DARLING HAS A FUTURE IN AUTOMOTIVE MECHANICS.

While I waited for a response I just stood there and looked at the mess of wires and hoses and compartments.  Not moving.  Just staring.

A few minutes later a maintenance truck for the apartment complex came down the hill.  TALK ABOUT MIRACULOUS. As the truck got closer, I saw my favorite maintenance man behind the wheel.  I will take this moment to say I never thought there would be a point in my life when I would have a favorite maintenance man.  

But I do and his name is Marv.

Since Michelle and I moved into this apartment last year, we have called the maintenance department no less than twenty times.  We call for all sorts of reasons - ranging from broken heat and refrigerators to burned out light bulbs. 

We also blow fuses with impressive regularity and call for help every time.

Marv has the honor of being a frequent responder to our calls for maintenance related assistance.  He is a gentleman of around sixty, weighs about 300 pounds, and has a freshly lit cigarette with him at every moment.  One time last summer he came to fix (yet another) blown fuse and as he left our apartment he said, "Welp, you ladies have a good weekend.  I'm going home, getting a shower, and then...I'm goin' clubbin."

More power to ya, Marv.

Anywho Marv pulled up next to me on Thursday, rolled down his window, and said, "Well young lady, you don't look like you're dressed for car repair.  Is everything all right?"

Marv, if everything was alright, I would not be standing outside in the 17 degree weather in my high heels staring blankly at the inner workings of my car.  I explained the situation and Marv got out of his truck, just like I knew he would, to take a look at things.  He leaned into the hood of my car with his burning cigarette and I crossed my fingers and hoped he wouldn't get it too close to anything combustible because THEN I'D REALLY BE IN TROUBLE.

He started speaking in automotive terms until I finally said, "PLEASE, MARV, DUMB IT DOWN.  I drive 4 miles to work each day.  Can this car be safely driven 4 miles tomorrow morning?"

The answer to that was yes, yes it could.

Matt still came over on his way home from work.  He checked things out, took Old Blue for a spin, and assured me I was safe to drive.  And then he started explaining brakes and pistons and sensors to me just like Marv had, and at the conclusion of his detailed explanation I said, "I don't really know what any of that meant."

And Matt sighed and said "IT'S BASIC FLUID MECHANICS! DON'T YOU KNOW BASIC FLUID MECHANICS?"

The answer to that is no, no I don't.  

Unless you're talking about the mechanics of the fluids wine and/or chocolate milk and then I'M YOUR GIRL.

Happy Monday!
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27 comments:

Baby Sister said...

Well yeah, cause milk chocolate fluids are the best!! Yay for having mechanic friends and savvy boyfriends. :)

Steph said...

Kudos to you for popping the hood and assessing the situation! Thank goodness for Marvs and boyfriends who know about cars!!

K said...

My husband is a mechanic and always tried to explain why things go wrong and how to fix them. All I hear is gibberish. Glad to know I'm not the only one!!!

Ashley Barnhill said...

HAHA I love this post! At least it's safe to drive! I know nothing about cars too and just assume my husband will fix it, ha.

Amy said...

haha.
The only thing i know how to do with my car is: fill up the oil/wiper fluid if it is running low, pump gas, and change a tire.
the end...everything else i'm completely ignorant!

P!nky said...

BAHAHAHAHAH your story is hilarious, I'm sorry.

Totally reminds me of me and car issues. My bf tries to explain them to me and I go, okay can i drive it or not?!?!

Love Marv already, 'going clubbin' holla holla!

xoxo

Staci said...

My new life goal is to one day have my very own BFF maintenance man named Marv.

Abbey said...

I am proud to say I have refilled my car's brake fluid before.

But it was after a kind man at Jiffy Lube showed me how. Similar, I think, to Marv.

Who I think I want to be bffs with. (Marv, not the Jiffy Lube man.)

rachel said...

Ha! Girl you crack me up.
Cars are hard. Real hard.
But thankfully sweet guys like Marv and Matt are there to help ya out!

Ashley from The Kitchen-Sink Chronicles said...

This is one reason I still adore my ex-boyfriend (even if he has his moments)... he's a mechanic and even though we're not together anymore - he always comes to my rescue!

Sarah and Stewart said...

Sounds like you're super lucky to have Marv! I used to live in this apartment on Queen Anne where my roommate and I would blow fuses CONSTANTLY, it was so annoying!

Sam M said...

My car tells me soemtimes my brake fluid is low too. What did you end up doing to your car?

Sarah said...

I think I had the pleasure of meeting Marv when I was over! You are quite right. He is very large and it looked like it would only be a matter of seconds before that cigarette fell to the ground. His grip was impressive. Reminds me of my grandpa who does EVERYTHING- swimming, eating, you name it- with a toothpick in his mouth.

ps. Love your profile picture!

scrapperjen said...

Happy Monday! I, like you, am pretty mechanic dumb. I have gotten better as my husband makes sure I know where to check all the vital fluids on our vehicles, tire pressure, etc, etc... BUT - beyond CHECKING things, yeah - not much help from me.

BTW - your post had me dying laughing.

And Marv sounds like a fantastic guy!

My-cliffnotes said...

I'm with you girl wine and chocolate yes, cars nope

Susannah said...

Goodness, this story is hilarious! Thanks for sharing!!! :-)

Married...with a Pup said...

Haha, love this post! I agree with you and know nothing about a car. That's what my dad and husband is for, right? You are awesome for trying though!

Jessica Gehman said...

So what you're saying is, a combination of Mechanic Google and Daddy via Text shouldn't be my own solution? Crap.

On that note, would anyone like to help me change my oil? Yes, I require assistance because the last JA that put my tires on used the stupid gun and now I can't get it loose. Awesome sauce.

Amie said...

Oh my goodness, you're adorable! New follower & yay for Marv!!

http://herestohappinesses.blogspot.com/

Rod and Alex - aka: "Rolex" said...

Haha! I'm in the same boat! Glad your car was safe to drive to work! :)

Shelby said...

I love this and the description of Marv! Too funny

Stacey said...

Without fail, your blog posts always make me laugh! But I can assure you that I am laughing with you, because this post could have totally been written about me...I know only the bare essentials about how my car works! Hope you were able to get your brake fluid fixed! Or filled up or whatever the correct term for that is :)

SMD @ lifeaccordingtosteph said...

Car things drive me literally insane.

Shay said...

You are hilarious! I would have been clueless when it came to the car, I know nothing!

Kristin @ w/milk and sugar said...

I am the same way! I have absolutely no idea how cars work and don't really have the desire to learn. Just tell me if it's safe to drive. Glad it worked out for you :)

Shelli Poole said...

My favorite post everrrrr!!! You are so entertaining and CUTE! :)

Ashley said...

Glad you have heat again! Hopefully you don't have any more problems with it! I love all the treats you got for Valentine's, especially that dinner... looks delicious!