Monday, April 4, 2016

the bar has been set

And then the next morning I easily and conveniently drove my rental car right through an EZ pass entrance on the turnpike instead of the cash ticket lane, and racked up a forty one dollar and fifty cent toll even though I only drove eleven miles.  Apparently when you exit without a ticket they charge you the price from the VERY FIRST ENTRANCE.

Literal highway robbery.

But, I decided to give renting another go, and my mom drove me over to Enterprise this afternoon to pick up a car for a work trip tomorrow.  As we pulled into the lot, she scanned the available vehicles and announced her prediction. "There's not much here today.  You will probably end up with that white minivan."

And then I walked into the rental office and Jake behind the counter said, "There's not much here today.  How do you feel about that white minivan?"

"That would be fine I guess," I told him.  

But then at the last second I added, "Is that all that's available?" because it doesn't hurt to ask.

"Let me check what's in the bay," he said, and walked over to the little garage area.  I always thought that's where they washed the cars but evidently it's where they hide the luxurious options because Jake came back to the counter and said, "It's a Jaguar.  Would that be okay?"

After checking to make sure it wouldn't cost any more than the standard (read: cheapest available) car that my nonprofit employer's Fiscal Hotline had approved, I set off in style in my very own Jaguar.

I parked the car in the street when I got home, and went inside and said to Matt, "Could you come outside real quick and make sure I parked close enough to the curb with MY JAG?"

The look he gave me resembled the one he gave me the other night when I laced up my sneakers and announced I was going to go for a run.

That is to say, complete and utter disbelief.  

But he walked to the front door and what to his wondering eyes should appear but a shiny black Jaguar.  

We went outside together because he wanted to see how many liters were in the engine and something about torque, and I wanted to read the manual for a few practical things like which buttons adjust the mirrors and how do I turn on the defroster?

On my drive home I'd noticed that behind the steering wheel there were two big buttons.  One had a "+" and the other had a "-." Naturally I thought they were for the radio volume, so I pushed the + while I was at a red light and the car sounded like it was going to take off.

After I adjusted my mirrors and found the defroster, I said to Matt, "what do you think these big buttons behind the steering wheel are?"

"Oh those?  Those are your paddle shifters." 

It's official.  I'm in over my head with all this luxury.  

As I was upstairs packing my suitcase for my trip tonight, Matt came into the bedroom and said, "I've been doing some research and that car?  It goes zero to sixty in 5.1 seconds."

Well, we will just see about that tomorrow morning as I merge onto the Pennsylvania turnpike.

Via the cash ticket lane, of course.


Rachel said...

Woah! Guess you never know what you're going to get! My dad worked in the car industry and sometimes had to take business trips overseas to visit Jaguar manufacturing plants and he thought THAT was really cool...but he's never gotten to drive one. :P

Molly Middleton said...

Omg hilarious! I love when you said he wanted to check out torque and all that fancy boy stuff and you just wanted to figure out how to work it! Hahah

Rebecca Jo said...

"MY JAG"... haha... that is fantastic!
I hope you drive with the radio blasting some good school rap, with some shades on & the windows half down... with the Blue Steel look on your face, of course :)

Melissa @ i carry your heart said...

Such a great story! I giggled when I saw this on Instagram :)

Lindsay at Lindsay'sSweetWorld said...

Hilarious! I would have been terrified to drive it!

Kristen @ See You In A Porridge said...

oh my goodness. not gonna lie, i'd be freaking out in a jaguar. i'd probably choose the minivan haha.

Michelle said...

You have THE BEST luck with rental cars.

Leslie said...

You are so funny! My husband looks at me the same way when I say I am going for a jog. Hope you enjoyed driving the jag!

Mattie @ Northwest Native said...

Haha, your look of disbelief comment cracked me up. I honestly have no idea what paddle shifters means. But it sounds fancy.

Faith said...

I laughed when I read literal highway robbery! Seriously, how do they think that is OK?! Not nice.

And paddle shifters? What is that? This luxury stuff is like talking another language.

Evelina said...

Girl, you're ballin! How long can you keep this rental? So awesome that it was the same price as the regular cars! This would be so awesome when if you're car shopping because you really get to try the car out before committing!
Evelina @ Fortunate House

Brittany said...

Man. Moral of the story? It never hurts to ask. Super nice!

Martha Woods said...

Oh my gosh, you're so lucky!! What a ride!

Pleas(e) and Carrots said...

Haha such a cool rental car! I've only rented a car once and got a regular Toyota, but my 6'2 dad reserved a mid size car once and for some unknown reason they gave him a yellow beetle! To go to a business meeting! Haha

Kayla MKOY said...

DANG GIRL - A JAG?!!? ;) you're rocking this rental car thing. I have to say though, the Charger will always be my favorite - hehe! I HATEEE toll roads. One time on vacation my grandpa went through that lane (total accident) and they mailed him a HUGE ticket. You're not kidding about highway robbery! ;)

The Lady Okie said...

That is the coolest thing! How fun.

SMD @ lifeaccordingtosteph said...

Oh, you're fancy! I love it! That beats a minivan any day.

When that happens to me with the EZPass thing in rentals, I just tell them I was in the rental and the EZP didn't read. They still deduct the toll from your account, but you don't have to pay the insane fee.

MilitaryPugWife said...

Wow! What a great story!

Liz Jo said...

Oh my gosh I've never driven a jaguar!!! How did you control yourself I would have driven like a maniac in that!!

Better play some Rihanna when you're driving that car, zero to sixty in 3.5, baby you got the keys, shut and drivvvvveeeeeeeee

liz @ j for joiner

Baby Sister said...

Ummmm. I want to rent a jaguar!! So jealous!

When we were in Texas this last month, the GPS took us on a toll road twice, but we never had to pay anything. I have no idea why, but it was so nice! Driving in Dallas is the worst thing I've ever had to do. Well, maybe besides driving in Chicago. Yuck.