Tonight I am coming to you live from a Sheraton in central Pennsylvania, where I am sitting in bed eating a burrito bowl from Moe's that I'm going to wash down with a few Advil.
Why the Advil, you ask?
Well, I fell down the stairs yesterday. And I don't mean I gracefully tripped down a few, or missed a step at the bottom. I mean one second I was standing in the second floor hallway, and the next I was lying in a pathetic heap on the living room floor.
The reason for my fall was our Christmas tree. I'd decided to hang some candy canes on it, and as I walked down the hallway I was admiring the festive touch the candy canes added, and forgot that I was approaching the staircase precipice.
We live in a split level, so luckily there were only six steps, but as I laid crumpled on the living room floor, my brain could not decide whether to laugh or cry.
So, I did both.
And now I just want to cry, because my right arm and left shin evidently took the brunt of the fall and are paying for it today.
Speaking of beautiful trees, we bought our first real Christmas tree yesterday.
We'd gone back (Matt) and forth (yours truly) on getting a real tree in addition to our artificial one, but yesterday we decided to stop at a few thrift stops to see if we could come across any treasures.
The very first thrift shop had a tree stand for $25.00, which is just highway robbery. They told us that Christmas items were all marked down, and that the tree stand would be $15.00. We were still going to pass on the it, but when we got to the back of the store, Matt found a really nice workbench, with a drawer and shelves and even a pegboard, which is apparently the hallmark of a professional workbench. He asked the shop owner if she would take $45 for the workbench and the tree stand, and she said yes.
From there, we headed on over to Produce Junction to get a tree. They had two signs, "BALSAM - $25," and "FANCY - $40."
I'm not sure what in fact made the fancy trees so fancy, but because I am no Christmas tree connoisseur, I said "Balsam works for me." And five minutes later Matt was carrying our tree through the crowded grocery store parking lot, which was admittedly not as quaint and charming as waltzing in to the woods to cut our own, but BABY STEPS.
I didn't realize all that was involved with setting up a tree. When I was growing up, my parents brought it in, got it situated in the stand, put on the lights and the garland, and I just swooped in at the end to hang the ornaments.
We brought the tree in the first time, and the hole drilled in the bottom wasn't big enough. So we carried the tree back out.
Brought the tree back in. Stand malfunction.
Carried the tree back out.
Brought the tree back in.
There were too many low branches for it to fit in the stand.
Carried the tree back out AND ALMOST LOST MY CHRISTMAS SPIRIT.
The fourth time was the charm, and we got the tree all situated in the stand and it was time to light 'em up.
Unfortunately, I miscalculated just how many lights that would require.
But, I'm happy to report that this was the status at 8:00 last night.
Just in time for me to go out of town for four days.
I'm sad to be away from my beautiful Christmas trees for four days, but at least I won't fall down any stairs admiring them.