Matt and I went out to dinner on Friday night. It was a beautiful night, and we sat outside and dined on organic, locally sourced cuisine.
I had a drink called Mermaid Water, we started with an order of "junkyard fries" that had so much cheese and ranch dressing we had to eat them with a spoon, and then I decided to keep it light and ordered loaded nachos for my dinner.
It was delicious.
On Saturday, Matt walked outside to mow the lawn, and we discovered that we were basically living on waterfront property. Our neighbor was filling her pool with her garden hose, but the part of the hose that was lying on the grass had sprung a leak, which she'd tried to repair with a band aid.
An actual band aid. Meant for a paper cut.
She came outside to check on things, and Matt went over to talk to her. She told him she didn't know why the pool was taking to long to fill, and he suggested the leaking hose. She acted like that was crazy talk even though we could all clearly see the ineffective band aid, but she offered to turn the hose off anyway while Matt mowed the lawn. He said he didn't mind, he was really just concerned that her water bill was going to be very high, and that our grass wouldn't dry out instantly even if she turned off the hose.
She still insisted she couldn't see the water ponding in our yard and Matt said, "The birds are swimming in it."
It brought back memories of the time we called the police a few years ago because our yard was a lake. It was wintertime and we thought a neighbor's pipe had burst, but no one was answering their doors. The police looked around and found out the hose was running at the house two doors up the street.
Also, speaking of calling the police for non-emergencies, my friend called me last week to tell me that she'd called the police because she heard someone yelling "Heeeelp, heeeelp," in the woods across the street from her house. The police arrived and it turns out IT WAS A GOAT.
She's new to country living.
Last night we went up to bed and turned on our multitude of noise machines. I kid you not, we sleep with the ceiling fan, a window fan, an oscillating fan, a small fan on the nightstand, a humidifier, and a white noise app set to the sounds of rain on a lake.
Amidst the cacophony, I thought I heard something else. Finally, I said, "Matt, do you hear that? I think I hear someone."
"Yeah," Matt said, "I brought the Amazon Alexa up. I'm just playing a little Bad Company."
Nothing like a little Bad Company as you drift off to sleep. But maybe tonight we won't even need the music or the white noise app, because it's raining and we now have our very own lake in the backyard.
Time to buy a boat.