Last night we were watching the evening news. As the camera zoomed in on the anchor (a very serious man in his mid-sixties) and his black and white striped suit, my dad said, "Oh look, Jim wore his gangsta suit tonight."
Friday evening was off to a fantastic start.
After we ate dinner, my dad announced that he thought it was the perfect night for a game of Monopoly. Matt even came over to join in on the board game night o' fun.
Phil started out confident and strong, and talked a big game.
But, thanks to some poor investments and not one soul landing on Baltic or Mediterranean, things took a serious nosedive to the south. Phil was the first one out of the game. After a little while Emily decided that making vanilla pudding would be far more entertaining than figuring out a way to mortgage her properties and save her last few dollars, so Phil played in her place. All he had to work with was a handful of mortgages and eleven bucks, so it would have taken a monopoly miracle for him to come back from that kind of financial ruin. After a few rounds, he went out for the second time.
Then, he mourned.
After Phil went out (again), Matt started raking in the the cash money, and I started losing it. People were landing on my properties left and right, but a $6.00 rent will get you nowhere fast. I'm looking at you, Oriental Avenue.
Oh sure, my parents may be laughing in this picture, but make no mistake. This was one cuthroat game. There was no mercy. My mom had to keep saying "It's just a BOARD GAME!"
I'm sad to report that if you spend eighty percent of your time in jail, only pass go twice, and collect a mere fifty dollars total in rent, there is no way you can win Monopoly.
Ask me how I know.
I have a little bone to pick with the Parker Brothers and the exorbitant amount of go to jail cards included in this game.
About two and a half hours in, Matt was hanging by a very thin, financially insecure thread, my dad was holding steady, and my mom had more money than the bank. Eventually, and I do mean eventually, my dad was victorious. He was thrilled to claim the title of Monopoly Champion.
He also told us that he wants to make this a weekly event, which means I have exactly six days to learn how to become more fiscally savvy in the world of board games.
And also to locate and destroy every last "go to jail" card.